This popped up in my YouTube feed this morning and it actually made me cry a little bit- what a great, great loss losing George Michael was. His album “Listen Without Predjudice” is easily one of my absolute essential of all time. When I was a teenager, I was firmly rooted in my world of Depeche Mode/The Cure/The Smiths, New Order, but George Michael always appealed to me.
I remember the first time I heard “LWP”- I bought the cassette, stuck it in my yellow Walkman, and went for a long walk (this was back when I still had physical balance) and the music INSTANTLY sunk straight into my bones- like, some deep part of my marrow, my being- and it was this entire transformative experience. I loved every song, I loved the order of the album, and I felt like I wanted to literally consume it so I could just sort of not stop hearing it. Listening was not enough for me, I wanted to, like, LIVE it. It wasn’t music, it was an actual experience. This has only happened a handful of times for me, so it was a big deal. I still love it so much.
This song, “Something to Save” in particular, gutted me and still does- just SO beautiful. One of my five favorite songs of all time, maybe even my favorite. Argh, his voice, the music, the lyrics… This song is really an experience for me.
“When I was at your doorstep
You told me to look around
Said come in
You and your heart sit down…”
I wonder if he’d still be here if he was able to live openly as a gay man, without all that horrible pressure on him to be a straight sex symbol.
It makes me so grateful that despite all the ridiculous hatred queer people still face, at least more people can live their truth and love who they want and explore their sexuality and identity without being ostracized. Everyone should be able to do that without anyone having any opinion about it. I truly believe that if everyone were able to love who they wanted, openly and without shame, the world would change instantly. I tink so much hatred and fundamentalism in the world is because of people’s own shame about their secret feelings that they can’t express because of their religion, culture, families, traditions, etc.
It makes me grateful that the world has shifted enough that my own daughter can explore her own path- her high school was a situation where while there were students who were out, it was just a few of them and mostly people kept it to themselves. She chose a college based on the strength of its communities, and I hope she find an amazing group of other creative people that she can be part of and feel embraced and free to be her quirky, funny, sweet self.
And I hope all the time other kids and anyone else struggling with their identities find people they can bond with, and be loved by. I’m not religious, but if there’s a chance someone/something is up there and considering requests, I hope that’s one that makes the list.